Thịt chó

The meat sat there in her bowl, an anathema.

“Go on, have a bite! Be brave! You’re a tourist, do touristy stuff! This is an experience you can’t get at home.”
“It’s not one I am sure that I want.” A grimace. “What does it taste like?”
“It depends how it’s cooked, like most things. The one in the bowl is fairly rank - too much ginger and lemongrass. And there’s still the occasional hair on the skin. If you liked black pudding like Dad, I would have given you the stuffed barbequed intestines. But the sliced, boiled meat is like a gamey roast beef.”

Picture sourced from here The dishes at 12:00, 1:00, 30:00 6:00, 7:00 and 11:00 are to be found on the reasonable to delicious side of the scale. The soupy one I can take or leave, and the lemongrass and ginger one I'm not a fan of, nor another one which seems to be cooked with small sticks of yuck (but again, that's the fault of the spice).

This is obviously fiction, as my mother has categorically stated she won’t try dog, for the same reasons she won’t eat kangaroo. It wouldn’t be fair to trick her. The rest of it is true though. Mắm tôm, the purple dipping sauce can take a bit of a run-up as well, if you’re not Australian. It puts me in mind of a liquid Vegemite. An old wives tale here is that eating dog’s feet is meant to increase a nursing mother’s milk supply. Tho declined, but her sister was gnawing on two or three a day for a while there, not that it seemed to help.

The prompt for this piece was ...what does it taste like... for week number 78 of the 100 Word Challenge. I shouldn’t have written it before breakfast though, as now I’m hungry.

Bandimals

It's been a while since I've done one of the 100 Word Challenges, because I kept getting sidetracked. The one for this week was the notes from the piano. After finding an awesome picture that suited the story, I went back and changed it slightly. I love the rabbit's martini. 

Picture from here, I'm going to go through the rest later as I love the style

Bandimals

"For the finale, the fireworks will be timed to go off with the final notes from your guitar -"
"I play piano!"
"Whatever, the fireworks will go off with the notes from the piano. Then you walk off, lead by the duck with the tuba -"
"It’s a saxophone!"
"And for something different, there won't be an encore. The fans will hate it at first, but I reckon they'll learn to love it. Trust me, I was in marketing!"
We look uneasily at each other knowing it's time to have the talk. "We think it might be time for Bandimals to get a different manager..."

Cocktails

More Halloween stuff. At the 100 Word Challenge, this week we're to think of a recipe. A cocktail recipe to me seemed the obvious way to go, but what with yesterday's potion and this older one for Unicorn Nipple Biscuits (which I like better, possibly because it is longer) I'm starting to run out of ingredients.

Here are the ingredients for a single serve, but when catering, mix a batch in your cauldron.

* One measure of bitter bile from a long-standing argument
* Two fingers
* Two fingers of whiskey
* A jigger of stolen souls – the real spirit
* Splash of broken dreams
* Nettles for colouring
* Pinch of brimstone
* A spoonful of ectoplasm

Disintegrate the fingers, brimstone and nettles with a howling curse. Add the remains to the shaker, along with the liquids. Shake then pour over ice. Add a dollop of ectoplasm. Serve chilled in a ruby slipper. Garnish with a stuffed fairy skewered on a witch-finder's pin.

Yeah yeah, it looks nothing like my description, but it's the coolest looking Halloween cocktail I could find. It's from here

Donny's Delight

By any yardstick, Donny was a bad man. As head enforcer, he’d committed some atrocious acts which needed no embroidering or additions to inspire fear. His reputation was tough, image harsh, his visage locked in a permanent scowl. If there was a hell, he’d certainly be going there.

These depraved and deplorable deeds caused him no torment, nor loss of sleep. It wasn’t the case that he took a perverse pleasure in them, he looked at it as a job that needed doing. But Donny was tormented, as in the dark recesses of his mind he was a furry, and that was something he could never be.


 
For the 100 word challenge this week, the prompt was … in the dark recesses of my mind … which I tweaked since this was written in the third person as there's no way Donny would be admitting this. 

 I have a real good mate who is a furry, he just got back from Anthro Con where he competed in the dancing competition. He made it to the semi-finals before being eliminated - not bad for his first time! Next year I'm sure he'll place better... he's started working on his new routine already.

Edit:  A furry is someone who identifies strongly with an animal, often going to the extent of buying a fursuit (or a partial one) that can run into the thousands. Think of something along the lines of a sports mascot or children's TV character like Donald Duck. My dancing mate bought a partial suit - head, tail, arms and legs - and dropped about 4 grand on it. Some more information here but after that I'd probably not recommend digging too deeply as it can get NSFW fairly quickly.

Treasure Hunter

Back at work, so paradoxically, time to write. I’ll leave this short, so I also have time to read (and comment) on other people’s entries for the current weekly 100 word challenge - to use the word ruby.

Treasure Hunter

He stood agog, staring at the mounds of treasure. Tomb robbing was easy! He hadn’t even needed to unsheathe the sword at his hip. He unwound the sack from his waist, wishing now that he had brought more, though now he knew the route, he was already planning his return.

Gems and gold flickered and gleamed in heaped piles from his torchlight. Thrusting his torch into the jaws of jewel encrusted statue, he fell to his knees and began shoveling treasure into his sack with both hands.

The eyes of the statue flashed ruby red, and his torch went out.

Picture from here. It's one of my favourite treasure images, I've loved it for years, maybe because of the tankard

The Red Box

Finance doesn’t really do it for me, so the prompt the red box for this week got turned into something else. This realistic stuff is more fun than I thought it would be, though I’m sure I’ll be back to dragons and spaceships soon enough. As always, there are already some  really strong entries, go read them all!

We had put the red box up high, out of reach - we thought - of curious little hands. We should have taken our cue from Pandora, and locked it away instead. The soft velvet covering was just too alluring, and the siren call of that within so tempting.

“Look mummy! Look! I’m a big girl, just like you!”

“She’s definitely your daughter,” my wife sighed.

I nodded in agreement, then reached for a weapon myself after the lipstick wielded by my wife skidded over my stubble to shrieks of appreciative laughter from our toddler.

“Doesn’t daddy look pretty too?”

Picture taken from here

Aftermath

Picture Source

Ash everywhere. Even now, days later, the reek emanating from it was palpable. Not a smell, but a taste in your throat. Ripped from our holiday we returned heartbroken. Fragments of our life survived, but it would never be the same. The vibrant green of the lotus in our wedding photo poked out, but we were charred beyond recognition. Smudged but still smiling, the fish I’d sewn for our daughter looked up at me accusingly. I turned to my wife, but her disappointment was hard to cope with. Yet again I futilely repeated my mantra “But I turned it off...”

*****

I have a feeling this will be a common take this week for the prompt from Julia's Place ...but I turned it off..., to me it’s the obvious way to go with it. With my incompetence and forgetfulness it’s a distinct possibility, and writing about it (and including personal touches, such as the lotuses in our wedding photo, and the fish I intend to make) would make my wife even more jittery. Tempting fate she would say. But seeing how I just did the altar for her last night to ward off ghosts and bad dreams (they got a nice beer and some chocolate), I should be fine.

The Traveller

A nice picture prompt this week for Julia’s 100 Words.

Giddy up!

The Traveller

Incredibly tired and hampered by the sleeting rain, he grimly pulled his cloak together, but the sodden wool provided little defence. The muddy road under his feet was quickly becoming impassable. Sighing heavily, he sat down on a log. Reaching carefully under his cloak, he gingerly felt about in various pouches and pockets, withdrawing a few items. Mumbling under his breath, he scattered some small bones on either side of the path, then he licked a feather, placing it on the fallen tree that was his seat. A flicker of green shot from his eyes and Merlin intoned “Arise, steed!”

Faster than Light

The new hyperdrive failed on its maiden voyage, stranding us in deep space. We didn’t have any hydroponic facilities so I joked to my colleague that at least we would asphyxiate before we were reduced to drinking our own urine. He didn’t appreciate the humour, and went looking for tools - but neither a wrench nor a screwdriver seemed to provide a solution. My co-pilot had a different opinion though, and took to the the failed propulsion unit with a gusto, beating it with the wrench and swearing lustily. Suddenly the computer chimed and gravity reasserted itself, we were home!
*****
I wanted tentacles. I wanted Rigel. But I only had 100 words for this leap of faith. Find the prompt at Julia’s Place, they’re fun and short!

Tails

This week isn’t really fiction, this is pretty much what happened. My lucky coin was one of the 1999 Year of the Older Person coins (I still have one here with me for important decisions) and we favoured it because we had a mate at Uni who was a mature age student - but not that much older - who was full of excellent advice. We still call him Wise Old Mr. Emitt now.

Picture lifted from here

 *****
The coin seemed to spin in slow motion, the light glinting and flashing as my future spun round and round. I’d weighed up the pros and cons for the decision, and at the time, both seemed equally sensible choices. So what better way to break the deadlock then by calling on Lady Luck? I snatched my favourite coin out of the air, and said to myself “heads, high school English and Computing, tails, primary teaching.” I opened my hand and the spiral glinted up at me. Course applied for: Graduate Diploma of Education - Primary I jotted down on the form.
*****
Woops, forgot to say this the weekly prompt from Julia's Place and the topic this week is flipping of some sort.

You bought her what... on Wednesday

Back from a cold Tet with questionable food (such as boiled tongue and intestine, which always made me wonder what the hell happened to the rest of the pig) here's a double entry for Julia's Place, the Wednesday one and you bought her what.

Waffles

Wednesday was always waffles. Waking early, we’d wend our wandering way, walking to Wally’s. Warmly welcomed (as always) we waited, while whistling wafted in with the mouthwatering scents. Watching for a wink or other sign of the present, I would listen to whispers of another time, way back in the past. Where there’s a will there’s a way they say, but Alzheimer's can sap your willingness - make you wish for what is fleeting, like a whimsical wisp of smoke writing wavering words. The rest of the world could wait. For the pair of us, Wednesday was always waffles.

*****
Go Jump

As we’re cleaning up the empty bottles, we can’t help but spill the beans. The details from the original agreement are hazy due to a similar drinking session - we’re not sure if it was making her a mother-in-law or presenting her with a grandchild that got the guernsey, but through teaming up we’ve covered all bases. “Go check your credit card details, we put it on yours, of course!” Some tandem parachute tickets, as was suggested in jest at last year’s birthday. Dad can’t help sniggering - until we inform him that we got some for him as well.

*****

We didn’t actually cross the line for this one before the timer (mum’s 70th) ran out. But we still threaten it from time to time.

 

Full house

Since I’m new to Julia’s Place and the 100 Word Challenges, I figured what better way to introduce myself than by doing this week’s challenge (of critiquing someone’s story from last week) than by writing about everyone’s story. It helps that I love the sound of my own voice - or should that be the gentle patter of my fingers on the keys - and I’m full of boundless optimism. It’s a slow week at work too, so plenty of typing time. 

Rather than critiques that can be taken to heart and cause anguish, these are more uplifting nice comments, either about the piece itself, or what it lead my train of thoughts to. If I’ve only tangentially touched on an entry it isn’t a case of “If you can’t say anything nice say nothing at all,” more that that piece got my mind going on a different topic. 

Too saccharine, overly gushy and a one-eyed one-man cheer-squad? Quite likely guilty as charged but I figure we all need more happiness and support in our life. Due to the naming, I’m still not sure if it’s meant to be 100 words or less, or exactly 100 words, so I went with the latter to be on the safe side and each one is 100 words on the dot. Don’t feel obliged to wade through the whole shebang though. If you haven't read that story yet, click on the title and it should take you to it.

This was a fun exercise and gave me something to shoot for before heading off to the in-laws for Tết, where I’ll try to distract myself from the lack of internet connectivity by pitting hypothermia against insobriety. 

 

*****

Acceptance Speech

It rings true for me, I can remember being in a nativity play as one of the three other kings (we had a big class, I wasn’t one of the wise kings, I was more along the lines of Curly from the Three Stooges). I tripped on my robe, and a button fell off, and I remember wagging my finger at it and telling it off rather loudly while an angel was supposed to be centre stage declaiming. The stage doesn’t call to me though, I have a good face for radio, but the voice of a silent movie actor.

*****
Blockbuster

A damn fine piece of writing! Like pretty much all the commenters on his page said, it definitely reads like a movie blurb... but we mean that in the best way possible. Nailed the format, good choice of wording, and the potted summary suits the 100 words we are allowed changing it from a limitation to something  that just feels right. The choice of actors makes it interesting too, maybe an older movie of his that went straight to video, or maybe they’ve kissed and made up and are cashing in on the punters counting on sparks flying once more.

*****

It Falls

Generally, poetry doesn’t do it for me, but I was really impressed by the extra effort (or maybe creativity is a better word to use for It Falls. I do like alliteration though, but I agree that when the seeding idea is so similar (all those A’s!), its going over the top doing too much, and it’ll cause it to grate on the ear. The swap from bird to plane was a nice touch and make you think differently about it right at the end. The five words are slotted in to the poem well, without feeling shoehorned or forced.

*****
Aquamarine

Planes in the first paragraph, yet whisked away by magic in the end - but done deliciously without a whiff of deus ex machina. Instead, it draws the reader in along with all that such a combination implies. The poise of the heroine makes her a very strong lead (and in such few words too) especially when the blokey bloke (maybe a servant, as he is the only one devoid of a title) thought he was taking her under her wing for protection. This is one where I definitely want to read more, it is a very enticing short story.

*****

Survivor

This is one of those pieces where less is more. The first few days penned by our chronicler were probably hectic. The next fortnight or so are likely unpleasant for those of us that don’t like horror. Skimming the comments everyone is complimenting the writing, saying how the implied actions he has carried out are creepy and unsettling but I can’t help thinking... in the the previous story, we had a strong female lead, and there’s the only pronoun the scribe uses is I... what if it’s a lady that’s doing the deeds, does that make it even more disturbing?

*****
Agatha

Wow, I wasn’t expecting the ending there. I must admit I’m a sucker for a happily ever after (and why the hell not? I’m living one right now and intend to for the rest of my life!) and so I’m glad there’s relief mixed in with her tears. I like the extra sartorial detail, it adds to the story. The first line is really powerful, sucking you into the action right away. The seed words are used early on in the piece, allowing more freedom with word choices towards the powerful ending. Green highlighting should be aquamarine though, I reckon.

*****
An Unplanned Descent

We are jolted out of a nice peaceful start by a serious (but only small) problem. At first I was thinking of doing something similar, but with the plane splattering over the landscape - I’m glad I didn’t as this is much more powerful as it’s grounded in reality. It’s also refreshing to hear that the pilot got lauded for saving everyone - rather than lambasted and dragged over the coals in a  multi-party law suit for technical difficulty as may well be the case today. Harking back to Blockbuster, I wonder if Tom Cruise would take this role too?

*****

Cocktails

Modesty prevents me from flapping my gums about this entry. It's OK, I already know how awesome I am.

*****
Weight a Minute

I’m metric so 175 pounds sounded like a lot until I converted it... merely 80kg. But even then I’ve only got a hazy grasp of weight as I’m a bloke so naturally oblivious. But I can hear my wife’s plaintive cries, especially as she’s entering her third trimester and is skyrocketing. It isn’t the batteries fault, nor the scales fault, but my fault. I love the way the internal voice keeps on ratcheting up the equivalent size to get something more appropriate. But you know what, I don’t really think aquamarine was your colour, I think turquoise is more you.

*****
Dangerous Creature

I love the additional “photoshopping” done to the picture, it really adds to it. I especially like the two-tone tail - it makes it looks like it’s snapped off and grown back a few times  making me think that it’s been in a few scraps before and is an experienced brawler. I agree with the commenters, acting inappropriately is a fantastic word choice. I also like lizard-like and can only hope that It Came From Outer Space... dun Dun DUN! There’s probably a more mundane explanation of where it is from. But I can still hope. Keep watching the stars!

*****
Translation Issues

Nicely done poking fun at language! It is interesting seeing teaching jobs advertised over here in Vietnam when they’re looking for Native English Speakers. There’s no anti-discrimination laws of any sort over here, so they can specify all sorts of things they’d get sued into oblivion back home. Because I look the part, they’d rather my slang-stained Aussie accent over obviously more qualified and competent teachers simply due to their nationality, irregardless of their linguistic ability. It drives us wild especially when our own company does it and should know better, we’re trying to change their thinking from the inside.

*****
Departure Gate

The descriptive clothing is a great start, and sounds like something I’d wear too (though my wife has hidden a lot of my more striking pieces - taking a leaf from my mother’s play-book as she burned a heap of my fathers clothes when they married). I agree with what some other people said, it flows on nicely from my entry too. I’m also pleased that her imperious attitude wasn’t enough to bring back the plane. It’s good when even minor villains get their comeuppance. Cleaning the planes with a toothbrush was a nice, pouty touch to the temper tantrum.

*****
The Celebrity

After the last diva spat in Departure Gate it is good to see someone more interested on mending fences at the end of the flight. Though depending on the size and breed of the dog, making amends might not be too effective - yes for something cute but maybe not as popular with a Great Dane. Traveling with animals can often be tricky, we did a five hour bike trip once with a couple of live chickens lashed to the back in a wicker cage due to their breed being especially tender and juicy but I couldn’t taste the difference.

*****
Life in Hollywood: Advertising

I like Aeroplane Jelly, Aeroplane Jelly for me! Being overseas for an extended period, the main thing I miss is food. My parents visit once a year, I’ve been back a couple of times, and friends are still an email or IM away, just like when I was out bush. But food, ahh... food. That is a completely different kettle of fish! Especially when some essential ingredients or tools are scarce here. Every time I go home it is with a long list of food I either want my mother to cook for me or dishes to order and enjoy.

*****

Mile High Meltdown

A prime example of write what you know. I’m thinking if it’d been me then physical violence, not words, would have been my response to snooty cow. Yes, it sucks for other passengers when there is a cantankerous kid on the flight, but it has to be much worse for the parents when everything they try fails to have any effect and they have to deal with snide comments and accusatory glares while still trying to pacify their kid and put out the fires. I’m glad that in the end she fell asleep, and gave you some much needed respite.

*****
The Aftermath...

Nicely done, it expressed sadness and humour tinged with love. It must be difficult for people whose loved ones go through such changes on so many levels. I especially liked the sausages, but in person hearing the description of the milk would have me guffawing with laughter, making it tricky to explain away any chagrin. I occasionally get flashes of similar situations since my kids are largely ESL... “Can you spell redacted?” “uhh... care to put that in a sentence? … Oh, you mean peanuts. An elephant likes eating peanuts! You weren’t saying the male appendage for procreation after all.”

*****

Swim or Die

 
I loved this entry, as it has the feel to me of some hard science-fiction a la Robert Heinlein even though there’s nary a spaceship in sight. I like the way she’s taken the word marine in aquamarine and run with it, it gives her story a different direction. With planning like this though, I’m wondering just how seasoned the grizzled veterans are. I have to thank Buddhafulkat for showing me Julia’s Place and introducing me to these fun challenges. She’s a fan of the hundred word format, and is going to be cranking out lots more of her own.

*****
The Perpetrator

Excellent cold descriptive imagery in this one that give me chills of fear down my spine. I definitely love the way the eyes have been singled out for attention. This is not someone with whom I’d like to cross paths - at least at the moment. Maybe normally she’s sweet and kind and was driven to to something completely out of character, but still I’d prefer to keep my distance. I’ve noticed a recurring theme in the about me blurb - there’s an awful lot us teachers participating in these hundred word challenges! I wish my class had the ability.

*****

 
All The A’s

This is a good example of alliteration focusing on one letter done well.  A task that is easier said than done. I hope that her sense of excitement and happiness remains - that she uses her new found magical powers for good, not evil. I first misread it as Andy acting unphased about it, but I’m sure that given a demonstration he’d be a wide-eyed convert. The choice of anklet instead of the more usual magic ring was a good touch. I wonder how she worked out that the anklet was magic, since the place of purchase was so mundane.

*****
Its Not Lupus!

A unique take on the prompts that is most effective. The reader ends up full of sympathy and can feel the annoyance caused by the quacks poking and prodding. Hopefully it all gets sorted soon without medical textbooks devoting a chapter to her in the future as they discuss her rare case. After the banter with the comments, I took a liberty to title the piece rather than name it after the blog - but due to the vagaries of TV programming over here, I’m unfamiliar with it - but it sounds like a running gag (something that everyone enjoys).
*****
How I Met My Husband

I love it! Another one based on fact, with a fairy-tale happily ever after ending. Such serendipitous   stories are fantastic stories for the retelling to loved ones. The author’s unsureness at the beginning is completely understandable, as the wonderous  buoyancy property of the waters of the Dead Sea fly in the face of what you’re used to. The seed words are fitted into the story seamlessly. It is nice that such a kind, simple gesture lead to something amazing, and sets a good example for all of us to improve our interactions with others... who knows where it may lead?

*****

The Glider

Vibrant and lyrical in the description, you can feel the pilot’s exultation and enjoyment in their hobby. It seemed tempting until things began going wrong - but luckily there’s the option of restarting or reloading... if only Real Life had that, too. We have  definitely come along way graphics-wise since games like Pong and Asteroids. But even with all raw power in video cards and processing power maybe the graphics in text based adventures like Zork are still better - how could mere polygons and pixels render something more impressive than the grue you conjure up yourself? Imagination trumps CGI.

*****
The A Challenge

 
These sort of stories are always fun to read to my students, particularly when introduced as “we’ll just have a quick story then go on excursion/to PE/our computer class/early play time” and watch the ripple of understanding spread out amongst them. The starting scene captures the weather in the doldrums very well sticky and unpleasant - that’s part of what makes the water so much more appealing. I hope after they go round and round a few times they manage to get to the bottom of what actually did happen, which I hope is nothing too serious.

*****
The Monster from the Deep

First thing I saw that blew me away was the professional banner. Wow, it looks great, and makes me want to have a rummage in your back catalogue of posts to find some gems. I know people say don’t judge a book by a cover, but we almost always do. Horror isn’t really my cup of tea though, so I might have to click away quickly, but it does draw me in. The mist from the lake is a great touch - one I thought was poetic license until this year when my new route to work wended past one.

*****

Autumn’s Auction Shocker

Having a troublesome kid can be difficult at any age, and bankrolling their exploits with cherished family heirlooms adds an extra level most people don’t have to deal with. Surely desecrating a burger bar by turning it into a vegetarian joint would be enough mischief? If someone I loved did that, I’d be furious (but then again I’m a raging carnivore and have jammed a wide range of animals into my slavering maw than just about anyone I know - missing out on cat recently since this is still the Year of the Cat so chowing down would be unlucky).

*****
Be Careful What You Wish For

It’s a commonly enough expressed wish, not to croak in a nursing home. I’m sure Jane is a competent pilot but nature and events conspired against them making what would normally be a a harmless flight of fancy (both verbally and physically). Of the options of strange places to die, I’ve heard “someone else’s bed” the most often. I like where this story is going if there is a chance for them to be dragged into some sort of urban-fantasy slash magical crossover as that waterspout was rather sudden in its appearance. Not so interested If they die horribly, though.

*****
The Letter

This one flew over my head at first, being new to Julia’s Place. But I figured it was something of an in-joke, so after a bit of sleuthing I put together enough clues to at least grok some of the edges. I like the tongue-in-cheek attitude of this piece, and would suggest that the appropriate response would be to get yourself elected in his stead, ousting him from his seat. I’m certain you could do a better job, though you may not enjoy it much. But think of all the good you could do, all the wrongs you could right!

*****

 
Blue Engagement

I like that the swain knew his best beloved well enough to forego the more popular diamond for an aquamarine. Engagement rings aren’t really done here, as you need family permission first, so we did the wedding ring shopping first, and then later I went to a jewellery shop I like and had one made: They melted down my One Ring (the Lord of the Rings Ring) and took my opal out of my custom Quake necklace and bunged on a few small diamonds. My wife doesn’t like wearing it much, but she loves the thought I put into it.

*****
Drowning

A fateful end full to an adventure that started out with altruistic good-will. Without the calming influence of his twin, I hope Karl doesn’t further self-destruct. Maybe this tragedy will bring them closer together whereas the accident seems to be forcing them apart. It is touching to see such a caring sister drop everything instantly to hurtle to their aid. I feel sorry for all of them, and wish that things could turn out for the better. Personalised sadness like this is effective writing - there would be other people on the plane, but their untold stories move us less.

*****

And that's a wrap! Much obliged if you read all the way to the bottom. A Happy Tết to you, Chúc Mừng Năm Mới!